Many of you know I bounce back and forth between St. Louis and San Francisco, and since I’ve returned to SF in February I can feel that it’s less gay.


My anxiety isn’t that San Francisco’s falling behind, but that it continues to be ahead of its time.


I’ve developed the hypothesis that as we become more mainstream the world becomes less gay. After all we can’t be both normal and novel.


Until fairly recently simply being LGBT made you interesting. You were part of a secret society that met behind unmarked doors. You were exotic, intriguing, and controversial.  The marginalization pushed us to be a tighter community, and we spent most of our social time together.



Increasingly we live anywhere and everywhere, and thanks to technology meeting others has never been easier. There’s less need to cluster.


One thing that has always defined our LGBT culture is our trademark irreverent humor. We’re some of the world’s wittiest and most entertaining people. That humor was born out of being disenfranchised, and I wonder how our humor and personalities will evolve in the wake of mainstream acceptance.


I certainly don’t want to romanticize the marginalization we’ve faced and in many areas continue to face. We haven’t reached the Promised Land by any means and the healthier future ahead will be incredible to see.


I’m just a guy who likes to be immersed among his people. I enjoy our people, and I’m a little anxious about homogenization.


And maybe I’ll kind of miss being novel.